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Is anything more painful than betrayal? Perhaps not, at least on the topic of relationships. Though common (one fourth to one half, depending on who you ask), this type of rupture is excruciating, and often fatal to the relationship.
Most often, the betrayal seems insurmountable at first. Reactions are understandably strong and absolute; e.g., “I could never be with you again”. “I will always be angry and resentful”.
Healing and recovering from an affair does take time, but it is possible if both people are willing to do the work. How long it takes depends on a number of variables, but I have found on average that two years is a fair estimate. Obviously, for some, it takes longer, and others dig deep and work it out sooner. Much of it depends on motivation and willingness to listen and understand.